Bonus blog this week, y’all. Because I am vibing something fierce today and thought maybe I’d write about it since I’m sure you’ve felt it too.
Sometimes, we can ask for blessings, and by all that is holy we can receive those blessings… we can feel joyous, blessed, delighted, overwhelmed with gratitude to receive this thing or these things we’ve asked for… and still mourn the loss of something precious that is sacrificed as a result.
Because blessings don’t come alone. I’ve said it before, I’m sure you’ve read it countless times, the old has to make way for the new. Things cannot change unless you make the space for them, and sometimes the space that is made is due to something you truly loved no longer being present.
It’s painful. It’s worth grieving over. If it meant so much to you, if it was so much a part of you, then it makes sense that it would hurt. It’s called sacrifice for a reason. And no matter how well you prepare yourself, or how ready you think you are, sometimes the sharpness of that pain takes you by surprise.
Yet, in our lives we are told so often to let things go or “get over it” that when we need the space to grieve, we feel… guilty. Especially if we have received a great gift. “I have this amazing thing to be thankful for, I have no right to be sad.” Except yes, yes you do. You have every right. You feel what you feel. You do not need to apologize for your emotions. You need to acknowledge those feelings, feel them entirely, meet them where they are and allow them the space they need. If you ignore it, feel guilty, push it away, it will only fester and turn into resentment down the road. It’s okay to be hurt and blessed at the same time. It’s okay to be grateful and grieving at the same time. It’s okay to cry and celebrate at the same time. There are no rules for this. There is no direction you need to follow except to be who you are and allow what you feel as you need to feel it. You need to honor your Self - whoever and whatever that Self needs to be today.
Give yourself permission. Honor your own space. Meet your Self and allow it what it requires to be its best. Not every day is a good day. Even if you have things to be thankful for, that doesn’t mean a loss or pain doesn’t exist. And that’s okay. Let it be what it is. You’ll get through it. The sooner you honor it, the sooner it will work itself out and you can get back to that celebration you’ve been so excited about. You have a right to be happy and you have a right to mourn. Separately. Simultaneously. Years apart. Or seconds. We feel what we feel for a reason. You’re not a bad person or ungrateful for being disappointed. You are a human being. With complex emotions. And navigating them some days should garner us a gold fucking medal.
Be who you are.
Be where you are.
Honor your Self.
I promise it’ll get better from here.
💖🕯🕊